Mae Yoshikawa on Choosing to Let Go of the Question “WHY?”
I had such a great discussion with Mae Yoshikawa for this episode. Mae’s boys were young when her husband died. One was 8 years old, and the other was just 5 months old.
Listen in our discussion for the important question Mae asked her older son after her husband died: What if the question right now is not “Why?” This hearkens back to her own experience when her mom became gravely ill when Mae was a young adult.
Summary of Key Points:
Mae's Personal Loss: Mae experienced the loss of her husband in a sudden traffic accident, leaving her a widowed parent of two young sons.
Questioning "Why?": Mae discusses how the persistent question of "why" this happened to her and her family initially consumed her thoughts, reflecting on similar feelings she had during her mother's illness.
Letting Go of "Why": She shares her journey of consciously choosing to let go of asking "why" and how this shift in perspective aided her grieving process.
Impact on Her Children: Mae talks about the impact of her husband's death on her children, particularly her eight-year-old son, who struggled with understanding the sudden loss.
Supporting Her Son's Grief: Mae describes how she supported her son through his grief, allowing him to express his emotions and questions fully.
Reframing the Grief Narrative: She emphasizes the importance of reframing the narrative around grief, moving away from questioning the reasons behind the loss.
Yoga and Meditation as Tools for Coping: Mae credits her practice of yoga and meditation as instrumental in helping her manage her grief and support her family.
Cultural Context: The interview touches on Mae's experience with grief within the Japanese cultural context, noting the challenges and perceptions she faced as a widow and previously as a divorcee.
Emotional Expression and Therapy: Mae speaks about the role of therapy in her and her son's healing process and her preference for expressing emotions in English, despite being bilingual.
Grief Camps and Support: The interview concludes with a discussion about Mae's search for appropriate grief support for her son, including their experience with grief camps in the United States.
Links & resources for this episode
Mae’s article: What a Tennis Legend Taught Me About Grief
More links for listeners
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