Laurel Braitman: What Looks Like Bravery
I can’t think of a better way to kick off Children’s Grief Awareness Month than to share my recent discussion with Laurel Braitman, author of the new memoir What Looks Like Bravery.
Longtime listeners will recall that I’ve often mentioned what a privilege it is to speak with grown-up grieving kids, and to hear firsthand their experiences and reflections after losing a parent at a young age. What Laurel gives us in this book is an incredibly intimate portrait of her life. She lets us inside, and she allows us to see how grief has affected one now-grown-up grieving child over the decades.
Her book and today’s discussion are full of beautiful insights - and I really can’t say enough about how incredible her book is. I don’t usually cry when reading books, but wow, I had a little trouble seeing the words on the last few pages through the tears that were welling up.
Summary of Key Points:
Laurel Braitman's Personal Grief Journey: Laurel discusses her experience with grief following the loss of her father as a teenager. She provides an intimate portrait of how grief has impacted her life over the decades.
Childhood Experiences of Grief: She shares insights into her childhood and how her father's illness and eventual passing shaped her understanding of loss and survival.
Self-Blame and Grief: Laurel talks about the common tendency among grieving individuals, especially children, to blame themselves for their loss. She reflects on her own feelings of self-blame after her father's death.
Impact of Grief on Life Choices: The interview touches on how Laurel's grief influenced her decisions and life path, including the pressure she felt to live up to her father's expectations.
Empathy through Volunteer Work: Laurel shares her experience volunteering at a grief support center for children, emphasizing how it helped her understand and process her own grief.
Understanding Grieving Children's Perspectives: She highlights the importance of recognizing the unique and often misunderstood ways children cope with grief and loss.
Reflections on Her Father's Legacy: The discussion includes how Laurel's father prepared her and her brother for life without him, teaching them various skills and knowledge.
The Importance of Sharing Grief: Laurel emphasizes the collective nature of grief and the significance of sharing these experiences with others.
Disentangling Self-Identity from Parental Expectations: The conversation explores how Laurel worked to separate her own desires and identity from what her father wanted for her.
Grief as a Lifelong Journey: Laurel conveys that grief is not a finite experience but rather a continuous journey that evolves over time.
Links & resources for this episode
What Looks Like Bravery: An Epic Journey Through Loss to Love, by Laurel Braitman
Laurel’s writing workshops
Dougy Center (Portland, Oregon)
Josie’s Place (San Francisco)
National Alliance for Children’s Grief: Find a grief support program near you
More links for listeners
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