Jessica Maitland Mayo and Micki Burns on Programs and Research at Judi's House

“Losing a parent or sibling in childhood is an Adverse Childhood Experience. And what the research is showing us is there’s a similar pattern here, that if your grief goes unaddressed, you end up — you know, it starts out with being absent from school more often. And then we start to see decreased performance. And then we see that maybe you’re having difficulties in your relationships or you’re having a hard time managing your emotions. And over time, if that continues to go unaddressed, it becomes depression. It becomes anxiety, it becomes substance misuse, it becomes suicidal ideation. And so if we don’t address childhood bereavement, if we don’t create preventative programs like we have at Judi’s House and so many other programs across the country, then this is a public health issue that we’re paying for and we’re addressing in other ways.”

— Jessica Maitland Mayo

I had such a great discussion with Jessica Maitland Mayo and Micki Burns of Judi’s House for this episode. Judi’s House is in Denver, Colorado, and Jessica is the CEO and Micki is the chief clinical officer. One reason I love the work Judi’s House is doing is that they put equal emphasis on both direct client services and real, critical research to advance our collective understanding of childhood bereavement and best practices. Plus, Jessica is a widowed parent and past client of Judi’s House, so it was wonderful to talk with her about her journey and reflections.

Some topics we cover on this episode include:

• Jessica’s journey as a widowed parent after her husband died by suicide when her kids were 7 and 11;

• Juggling a demanding job along with her grief and her kids’ grief;

• Her number one desire to protect her kids;

• The importance of telling her kids the truth about their dad’s death;

• Her family’s experiencing as clients of Judi’s House;

• The founding of Judi’s House by Brian Griese and Brook Griese;

• The Judi’s House Pathfinders program for youth ages 3-25 and their families, and the measurable positive outcomes;

• Stats on childhood bereavement from the Childhood Bereavement Estimation Model that Judi’s House has developed and partnered with New York Life Foundation on;

• Why childhood bereavement is a critical public health issue;

• How emphasis on preventative care in the mental & behavioral health field is lagging emphasis on preventative care in the physical health field; and

• The relative lack of research into the needs and challenges of bereaved families.

I hope you enjoy my discussion with Jessica Maitland Mayo and Micki Burns of Judi’s House.

Links & resources for this episode

• Judi’s House web site

• Comprehensive Grief Care for Children and Families: Policy and Practice Implications, by Brook Griese, Micki Burns, and others

• Childhood Bereavement Estimation Model (CBEM)

• New York Life Foundation

• National Alliance for Grieving Children

• Eluna

• Camp Erin

• Winston’s Wish

• Dr. Justin Yopp

• Dr. Julie Kaplow

• Dr. Irwin Sandler

• The Gifts of Imperfection, by Brene Brown

More links for listeners

• Download: Kids & Grief: What You Need to Know

• Article: I’m a Widowed Mom: Here Are My 3 Tips for COVID-19 Widows

• Book: Widowed Parents Unite: 52 Tips to Get Through the First Year, from One Widowed Parent to Another

Thank you sponsors & partners:

Help Texts - Grief support text messaging service. Tips and support delivered all year long, personalized based on your loss. Listeners get $10 off: https://helptexts.com/jennylisk

BetterHelp - Talk with a licensed, professional therapist online. Get 10% off your first month: betterhelp.com/widowedparent

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